"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it." - Ferris Bueller

Monday, October 04, 2004
Political Novocain
Much has been made over the weekend about W’s supposed lack luster performance in the Thursday night debate. Now, while I will admit that he didn’t give his best showing during that debate - at times he looked downright bored – I do not believe that alone will dictate the outcome of the election. In fact, I believe I see some political strategery in the way W is taking on Lurch.

Now remember one undeniable truth of life – everything can be related to football. There are many ways one can compare football to politics, but my commentary today involves the movie Remember the Titans. It starred Denzel Washington and is truly one of the better football movies every made.

As the boys get ready to go camp, Coach Boone (played by Denzel) is challenged as to the lack of variety in his offensive playbook. Explaining his philosophy, Boone said the following:

I run six plays – they’re all Split Veers. Like Novocain, give it time, it always works.
This is the answer to the critics who claim W kept repeating the same charges about Lurch, over and over. There is strategery here, people. W has six things he wants people to remember about Lurch:

1. He changes his mind more often than he changes his shorts.
2. He will not act in the best interest of America, unless of course its in the best interest of France.
3. He loves to spend your money on his priorities.
4. He will do what is politically expedient, not necessarily what is right.
5. He cannot be trusted to lead the United States Armed Forces in time of war.
6. His face has been bio-chemically altered to appear as living flesh.

Ok, so maybe I added one to the list. You pick which one I added.

Lurch did very well with nuance during the debate. W, by his own admission, doesn’t “do” nuance. Neither do the American people.

I believe W has taken a page from the play book of the British Admiral Lord Nelson of long ago. When over hearing a young officer explain the tactics of maneuver to another sailor, Nelson declared the following:

Never mind maneuver, sir. Always go straight at them!
Here endeth the lesson.

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